Friday, April 13, 2007

***Window Treating***

What's the point of eyebrows?

Seriously. Why do we have that small patch of hair above each of our eyes? I thought about this the other day while doing my daily plucking. Other than aesthetic enhancement, what's the point? Some might feel the same way about eyelashes but I've made sense of those. Eyelashes filter out the microscopic crap before it catches us in the (eye)balls.

I didn't say it was great logic, but it puts me to ease enough to think about other trivial eyebrows.

Men don't even tinker with them the way women do. Well, some of them.

This guy does. He has EXCELLENT eyebrows. He's really pretty.

I don't remember his name but he is the makeup guy of one of the most fukked up shows on television called . Ever seen it?

Basically, they find folks who have aged so badly that they go on TV and talk to this guy on a couch who is quietly saying "Daaaaammmmn!" to himself as they pour their hearts out to look age-appropriate. The purpose isn't what's fukked up. It's the method. They put these people in a glass box and let people on the street guess how old they are and speak flaw-for-flaw as to why they look so awful. LIKE THEY DON'T KNOW! Well, some of them don't. Either way, it's super tragic because the host almost refuses to continue onto the next segment until the guest feels like absolute shit first.

He'll be like,
"So Heather, while you were being gawked at in a glass box, we've heard people talk about your forehead creases, obesity, Crowe's feet, bad skin, turkey neck, and frown lines. You've told us about how you let yourself go because your boyfriend left you and your kids decided he's cooler than you so they moved out to live with him. According to our results, everyone on the street thinks you look 54 (she's 42). How does that make you feel?"
It's so fukked up.

Anyhoo, I digress. Eyebrows are the window treatments to the windows of your soul. Remember that. Hey you know what? Some clever nugget on Google suggests that eyebrows are for non-verbal communication. Surprise, anger, curiousity...all that. Finally! A conclusion!

Now if someone could just explain...

I saw on Discovery Health (or some channel like that) that this man willed himself to lactate. I swear. There were pictures. This man breastfed his child. So that, I believe, is why men have nipples.
WOW. I don't know what to say, lol.

So good to have you around:o)
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