E-RANTS AND INSIGHTS

And our relationship isn't perfect. Lately he's been lying a lot. He'll say that I have a little battery power but then he dies on me mid-conversation. I was heartbroken the first time it happened but I forgive him and move on because I'm not perfect either. I question if it's possible to truly love inanimate objects, so I checked out the definition in the Bible. (My mother would be SO proud!) 1 Corinthians 13 reads:

• "Love is patient": In most countries, this is known as "Call Waiting"
  
• "Love is kind": He always asks if I would like to answer the incoming call
• "Love suffers long and is kind": I've dropped him several times and he continues to function like he did on the day we first met.
• "Love is not jealous": I've eyeballed the iPhone a few times without consequence
• "Love does not brag or is arrogant": SuperPimp knows he is the isht. We both do. And does he toot his own horn? Of course not...that's my job.
• "Love never fails": It's been 3 great years